Ariel Castro: Is he just the tip of the iceberg of men who abuse women?

Ariel Castro is now being held for 8 million dollars bond.  Accused of kidnapping three women (one, a girl of only fourteen at the actual time of kidnapping), prosecutors are seeking the death penalty.  There is a huge sigh of relief that the women have been recovered and that Ariel is now in custody, and rightly so.

Perhaps this is a good time for us men to really reflect on our attitude towards women in general and come to terms with women’s plight in our society overall.  If truth be told, it seems that we men, more often than not, tend to turn a blind eye to their mistreatment or give it a wink—be they spouses at home, women on the streets and in public, or women at the office and in the workplace.

For years women have been demanding better treatment, more respect, and real justice.  What do we men have to say about it?  Popular speaker, Rush Limbaugh, has popularized the term “Feminazi” as a way of describing women who dare to stand up to men and demand their right for respect, justice, and an equal place at the table of opportunity, power, and influence.  And what do we men do?  We laugh and agree with Rush Limbaugh, rather than admit that these women make a good point.

And what is the point?  Women are daily being accosted, ill-treated, misused, and abused—and the perpetrators are adult men who will cry, kill, and die for their own sweet mothers but then turn right around and treat other women like dirt, for their own good pleasure, objects to be used at will, and thrown away when done.

It’s time for men to speak up as men, to men, about men’s mistreatment of women.  And I do not say this as one who is innocent of blame in this area.  Though I have never laid a hand on my wife, doing physical harm, I have accosted her and intimated her with my anger, with raised voice—emotional abuse.  Yes, I too am guilty.  I confess.  And it is not good.  Nor is it right.

We men need to hold each other accountable.  Women cannot do it for us.  There are many corridors of power and influence in our society: the military, politics, education, the work place, in Wall-Street, and in our churches, mosques, and temples, to name a few.  And, women have been and are being abused and mistreated in every one of these places of power.  If we are going to be real men, we need to begin to change ourselves and the system that allows men to so easily take advantage of women.

The arrest of Ariel Castro should be a wake-up call to all men.  We men must no longer accept the status quo and act as if it is okay to treat women as objects for our pleasure and ill-use.  Perhaps, it’s a simple matter of just speaking up with disapproval the next time you are in a bar, and you’re having a drink with your buddies after work, and one of them says something derisive and insulting about women in general or to a woman in particular.  Major change begins with simple small steps in the right direction.  Or are we men too weak and insecure to actually give women the respect and consideration that they deserve?